» My Sussex Wedding
Zara Friend lets us in on her wedding plans
The wedding
I met my fiance Dean back in 2002, when I was working part-time while I studied at college. We have been engaged since 2005 – a long time to some but we always had the 2008 date in mind. The two years have flown by and now we’re in the final stretch to our big day. It’s been two years of gradual planning and lots of saving. The average wedding is said to cost £16,000, but this takes into account a minimal no-fuss ceremony to an all-out extravagant do at the other end of the scale. Hopefully, ours will fall somewhere in the middle.
We’ve had the time to plan and think about what we want as the day needs to be special and memorable. At first, the costs involved did seem a bit crazy but on further research, this was simply the price of having a dream wedding. With this in mind, we embarked on the fun preparations to follow that would culminate in the big day.
Venues
For me and Dean, there is no better backdrop for a wedding than Sussex. The thought of a beach abroad crossed our minds – who wouldn’t love the guaranteed perfect weather and tranquil setting? – but it would be difficult to point out the spot where you were wed 15 years later as you take a drive with the kids.
I always envisioned a sprawling country hotel with a gravel driveway and plenty of rooms for friends and family to stay over. Back in 2006, we visited venues around Sussex for inspiration. A quick internet search and chatting with friends had drawn up four possibilities within our budget and another few after that. One venue nestled in the South Downs nearly won us over. It was the perfect setting, modern yet homely. The problem was, it was too small. For weddings, they would erect a marquee for the guests, which would be great on a balmy summer’s evening but you can never tell with British summertime. A hundred guests huddled under a marquee protecting themselves from the rain and mud is not a look we were going for.
Our search continued, taking us west of Sussex, away from the seafront and busy city centre. We quickly decided on the picturesque town of Arundel. In terms of travel, it would take guests around 40 minutes to reach Arundel from the church in Hangleton. Realistically, we could spend just as long driving into central Brighton of a Saturday.
Dean and I went to Arundel when we first started going out, so the area has significant history to us. Set against the grounds of Arundel Castle, our chosen reception venue is the Norfolk Arms Hotel. Traditional and picturesque – set in the middle of the high street – this is exactly the venue we had in mind. There’s a large car park for guests (it’s the little things to think about) and there’s more parking available down by the river.
Arundel offers fantastic photo opportunities close to the hotel grounds with the stunning backdrop of the castle in the background. The back-up plan (weather wise) is the interior of the hotel where the grand staircase is perfect wedding party photos.
Inside, the reception room is traditional and inviting. Large windows run along the back wall, allowing plenty of light in, while the high ceilings make the room feel more spacious, despite only holding 100 guests. We will travel to the hotel from the ceremony. This takes place in the 17th century church that sits above a spacious green in Hangleton. The whole feel is quite traditional with some fun twists, including the primrose yellow vintage car we have hired for the day!
Well dressed
In summer 2007, the search for the perfect dress began! With mum and big sister in tow, we headed to Pronuptia in Hove. This was always my first choice as mum had bought her dress there back in 1980. The variety is overwhelming so I thought it would be a good place to start. You also hear stories of smaller boutiques going out of business and brides left without a dress a few weeks before their wedding. Pronuptia is a well established company and the dresses they offer are absolutely stunning. I had a few in mind from the catalogue, but in the shop there were even more to choose from. Like any outfit, you can’t tell how it will fit from seeing it hanging up. They had to be tried on. I selected different styles from fitted to full; plain to embellished. The saying that you know it’s ‘the one’ as soon as you put it on couldn’t be further from the truth. I had doubts with every one I tried. It was only after a retry, a sit down and a walk around the shop that I finally selected my dress. The staff at Pronuptia selected a veil for me to try on to get the whole look. They have a great eye for style and the one I tried I actually bought the same day. The staff were so helpful and i’m glad I had my mum and sister along to offer their advice too.
The harder task was selecting the bridesmaid dress. I chose to have just the one bridesmaid – my older sister, Hannah. This would keep things simple, and we wouldn’t have the trouble of finding one dress to suit various shapes and sizes. Pronuptia had their new collection in store from last August. The problem was the choice on offer. The styles were gorgeous and each came in a variety of colours. The theme for our wedding is yellow and light blue, and Pronuptia had a gorgeous silk taffeta blue that was ideal. It took Hannah and I a few days of thinking before deciding on one dress. The choice made, it was time to fit the male members of the wedding party.
A third visit to Pronuptia, this time in September, and the suits for the men were chosen. There are five needed in total, Dean, my dad, our best man, Steve, and the ushers, Matt and Richard. The quality of the suits Dean tried on were superb, and it was fun to see the transformation from casual to groom. Thecravats match the colour of Hannah’s dress and Pronuptia offer the finishing pieces to the suits, down to the shoes and the cufflinks.
With the wedding party dressed and the venues sorted, it was time to plan the other aspects of the day.
Rings
The wedding ring I chose was from popular jeweller, HM Samuels. The band is 18 carat yellow gold to match the engagement ring. Small diamonds are set in the band and there is some detail around the edging. I have naturally slim hands (it runs in the female side of the family), so the ring is delicate and not too heavy looking.
The groom’s ring is yet to be chosen. It will probably be from a different jeweller, but 18 carat yellow gold to match mine in style. Dean doesn’t want a plain band, but one with three diamonds set in the ring.
A little creativity
The stationery can take up a large amount of the wedding budget, despite seeming such a small thing. Around £500 can be spent on invitations, place cards and postage alone. Early on, I decided to design and make the wedding invitations myself with help from friends and family. It not only proved to be a money saver but more fun, too. I love the creative side of things and it adds a personal touch to the wedding. The yellow and blue theme is continued in the stationery from the ‘Save the Date’ tags to the place cards. A lot of people opt for a wedding planner to help with their ideas, but I love being involved with every step of the preparations and have found it a lot more satisfying.
The cake
The wedding cake has been through many planned guises. Dean and I love angel cake and considered this as a possibility. It’s different to the traditional fruit cake, but it would take a lot of time and effort. As it was pointed out to us, we may not even get a slice. Simplicity is the best option. We have chosen to have a a three-tiered cake, fruit on top, chocolate marble for the middle and madeira sponge for the bottom layer. The designs I like originally had the layers atop one another, separated by a thin cake board and dowls as support. This is all very well for an entire fruit cake, but with the fruit cake on top, it would be too heavy on the sponge layers underneath. Images of a collapsed cake on arrival at the hotel flashed in my mind. It was going to have to be three separate cakes on a stand. This would also make transportation easier.
A current trend is to have around 100 individual cupcakes made and set upon a three tier stand to appear as a wedding cake. This was another option but one we decided against in the end. The next phase was the cake decoration. Flowers, real or fake, often adorn wedding cakes, but we are keen on having petals made entirely of icing. The topof the cake is undecided as yet. The traditional bride and groom figures have been replaced largely by flowers. There is a company who create the clay bride and groom to look like the couple, as you supply a photograph to them to work from. This is an option we may go for and we would have a wonderful keepsake at the end of it.
The hen and stag nights
The stag and hen do can be a tricky one. Saying that, Dean has his stag weekend mapped out. A month or so before the wedding, he will head off to Prague, the city of culture, history and cheap beer. A weekend away is commonplace nowadays, and the idea of going out the night before the wedding is definitely out of the question. It can be quite hard to approach the subject of hen and stag nights. They have become more expensive, with weekends being spent away at a time, but you want your friends to be there. The important thing is to try and cater for everyone. Dean will also be having a second night out locally for those who can’t make the trip abroad.
The hen party is still in the planning stages. Again, it’s looking like a three or four day affair. There will be a meal for family members, perhaps a hotel spa day or a chocolate feast at Choccywoccydoodah’s Boudoir in Brighton. The choices seem endless.
The honeymoon
At the end of two years of planning and the wedding itself, Dean and I will need a restful holiday. Instead, we are jetting off to the land of rollercoasters, Jaws and Tigger, as we visit Orlando for our honeymoon. This was decided in the early stages as we have never been there before. Our honeymoon is the chance to have a fortnight off and pay a little more for a holiday we haven’t yet experienced. We can visit the Spanish beach any year – Florida is something different. We are both avid movie fans so the hotel is close to Universal Studios on International Drive. The theme parks, restaurants and shopping malls also beckon. It’s going to be a busy time…
